A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think I am morally bankrupt
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
