The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
