k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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