the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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