I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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