I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
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He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
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the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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