Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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