Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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