It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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