Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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