You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
