I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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