Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize