Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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