The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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