Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.

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  (614): I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone. http://tfl.nu/eom9
  Replies (4) Good night (557) Bad night (770)
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  (707): View more from California

  so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?

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  (707): so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal? http://tfl.nu/w2t0
  Replies (27) Good night (984) Bad night (3167)
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  (518): View more from New York

  alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?

  (1-518): View more from New York

  dude. you drew those with your dick

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  (518): alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from? (1-518): dude. you drew those with your dick http://tfl.nu/4t0i
  Replies (24) Good night (7284) Bad night (1421)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.

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  (479): I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle. http://tfl.nu/61o1
  Replies (18) Good night (974) Bad night (7684)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter

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  (440): Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter http://tfl.nu/frpq
  Replies (8) Good night (2388) Bad night (1064)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb

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  (503): gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb http://tfl.nu/zgfq
  Replies (24) Good night (4277) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.

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  (713): He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off. http://tfl.nu/azk9
  Replies (8) Good night (671) Bad night (2173)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.

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  (570): Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied. http://tfl.nu/2f2b
  Replies (12) Good night (2556) Bad night (577)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.

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  (906): Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too. http://tfl.nu/qk1z
  Replies (10) Good night (1226) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.

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  (310): Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth. http://tfl.nu/zdvm
  Replies (5) Good night (961) Bad night (460)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?

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  (770): A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay? http://tfl.nu/s9ck
  Replies (8) Good night (455) Bad night (1431)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  That boy needs some memories to take back home with him

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  (336): That boy needs some memories to take back home with him http://tfl.nu/bmt8
  Replies (4) Good night (1150) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.

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  (609): I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains. http://tfl.nu/mhck
  Replies (2) Good night (294) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey

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  (787): I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey http://tfl.nu/3kl5
  Replies (5) Good night (423) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me

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  (+61): Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me http://tfl.nu/fiyb
  Replies (4) Good night (529) Bad night (211)

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