Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
