He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i think i have herpe
just one?
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
