I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
