Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
