You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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