did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
