I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
