I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
