I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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