She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
