her vagine was all disorganized.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize