As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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