the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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