I am in a vortex of obligation.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
