Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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