there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
