The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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