I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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