we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
