Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
