imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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