dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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