oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
