This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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