Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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