The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize