she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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