Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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