the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize