Non-Jews are for practice
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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