The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
This is not my ceiling
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
