Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?

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(502): Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF? http://tfl.nu/6t5x

Replies (21) Good night (751) Bad night (1903)
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(847): View more from Illinois

what did you hear about me?

(630): View more from Illinois

that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around

(630): View more from Illinois

that was hard to say and not laugh

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(847): what did you hear about me? (630): that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around (630): that was hard to say and not laugh http://tfl.nu/dwdl

Replies (13) Good night (4617) Bad night (928)
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(630): View more from Illinois

wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?

(816): View more from Missouri

yes. helicopter.

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(630): wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back? (816): yes. helicopter. http://tfl.nu/re1i

Replies (19) Good night (5610) Bad night (991)
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(514): View more from Quebec

He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.

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(514): He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic. http://tfl.nu/4dpi

Replies (38) Good night (12170) Bad night (1207)
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(740): View more from Ohio

So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?

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(740): So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes? http://tfl.nu/wyhr

Replies (11) Good night (1580) Bad night (4062)
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(517): View more from Michigan

I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors

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(517): I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors http://tfl.nu/omyr

Replies (14) Good night (1117) Bad night (4928)
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(630): View more from Illinois

she could've warned me his penis was curved

(708): View more from Illinois

ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.

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(630): she could've warned me his penis was curved (708): ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/vp5d

Replies (14) Good night (1705) Bad night (4689)
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(714): View more from California

You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.

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(714): You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works. http://tfl.nu/2moz

Replies (10) Good night (2045) Bad night (776)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..

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(724): I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star.. http://tfl.nu/hv80

Replies (9) Good night (2178) Bad night (686)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply

(1-414): View more from Wisconsin

I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday

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(414): We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply (1-414): I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday http://tfl.nu/j6sm

Replies (10) Good night (5081) Bad night (762)
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(317): View more from Indiana

do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?

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(317): do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards? http://tfl.nu/y683

Replies (16) Good night (2152) Bad night (988)
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(631): View more from New York

But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND

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(631): But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND http://tfl.nu/5e4y

Replies (23) Good night (2704) Bad night (529)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?

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(203): If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche? http://tfl.nu/avjw

Replies (22) Good night (3069) Bad night (840)
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(404): View more from Georgia

So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.

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(404): So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care. http://tfl.nu/6j38

Replies (16) Good night (1028) Bad night (1801)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.

(1-401): View more from Rhode Island

Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table

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(401): Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it. (1-401): Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table http://tfl.nu/unxn

Replies (5) Good night (1041) Bad night (389)

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