I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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