I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Ketchup is God's man juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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