He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Randomize
